a peek inside the fishbowl

I have always been secretly fascinated by the concept of the all-you-can-eat (AYCE) buffet.

This past summer I had the opportunity to check out a few buffets for a piece I put together for Ottawa Magazine. It sounds like a rather glamorous assignment doesn’t it (and don’t get me wrong, it certainly was a lot of fun) but by the end of it I was totally sick of food. We were invited to a potluck dinner for a friend who was visiting from Kenya and someone made a comment about small amount of food I was eating. Was I on a diet? Ha. No. I’d been eating so much that I couldn’t stand the thought of eating any more.

And I LOVE FOOD.

Before I started my buffet piece for the magazine, I posted a question to Ask Metalfilter. Here it is. I was interested in hearing more about the origins of the AYCE. I (wrongly) assumed it was a Western invention, after all, look at our serving sizes, and our waistlines, and see how they compare to the world average! [Sidebar: anyone see CNN’s obesity map of the US?] 

About a month ago there was an article in the Saturday Citizen about buffets (I can’t remember the gist of it), and the author happened to quote someone in the same Metafilter thread regarding AYCE buffet strategies by someone named klangklangston. I am reposting the same tips here too, because they’re too good not to share:

“First off, be hungry. Don’t eat earlier in the day, or if you do, eat only small things.
Second off, make sure you’ve got the capacity. I find that emptying my bowels prior helps the experience.

Third, I like to get a massive high on before hand. I feel that it stimulates the appetite.
Fourth, the bread is your enemy. It is there to fill you up. Ignore it. You don’t want to look back on your death bed and think “I could have eaten more, if not for that bread.”

Fifth, pace yourself. Gorging quickly can give you a cramp.

Sixth, water is also an empty gesture. Try to avoid drinking too much.

Seventh, try to recruit your skinny, high friends. The fat ones will have stomachs compressed. The skinny ones will challenge you to eat more. You must best their gullets!

Eighth, beware of spices. The Indians whose buffet I frequent viciously increase the level of heat to discourage gluttony. A little bit of milk or cream or fat will cut the heat (a lassi). You’ll pay the next day, but that’s the future, and the buffet is now.

Ninth, if you’re eating so fast as to have to belch, slow down. The goal is to keep eating even after you’re full, but not to get extra air down there.

Tenth, you can often snag a take-out container, which is like having an extra stomach without having cud. I.e. awesome.”

As part of my research for the article I went to several AYCE buffets, but what I was looking forward to the most was taking Emma and Sarah along with me. They’d never heard of such a crazy thing before.

The place we went that day was one I mentioned in the magazine article: Buffet Yang Ming on Merivale Road. It is very kid-friendly and the food is pretty good. There is truly something for everyone here, which is ultimately why I recommended it.

I did a bit of coaching before we arrived:

“Okay girls, we’re going to a different kind of restaurant today.”
“What do you mean?”
“Well, this is the kind of restaurant in which we don’t order our food like we normally do. We go choose it ourselves.”
“Where?”
“There are big tables full of food, and we pick what we want to eat.”
“Is there going to be cheese?” (This was Sarah talking.)
“Yes, I think might be some cheese.”
“And sushi?” (This is Sarah, again)
“Yes, I happen to know there is sushi.”
“What else?” (Emma was concerned.)
“Oh, lots of different things. Tell you what…”
“What?”
“You can choose to eat whatever you want.”
“REALLY?”
“Yes.”
“Even dessert?”
“Yes.”
“Can we eat dessert before the healthy stuff?”
“Well, what do you think would be the smart thing to do?”
“Eat it after.”
“Right. Oh, and guess what?”
“What.”
“You can go up and serve yourself as much food as you want.”
“Really?”
“Yes.”

I could tell the girls thought the idea of an AYCE buffet was totally weird.

Yang Ming has it all – fries, onion rings and chicken fingers, a salad bar, “traditional” Chinese food, sushi, and dim sum. I love watching what people load on their plates, the combinations of food hitherto unheard of i.e. breakfast sausage and egg rolls, sweet and sour chicken balls and rice pudding. A lot of people go for the fried stuff. Btw, it’s not worth going for the sushi. It’s dense, sticky and generally tasteless. The smart folks stick to the dim sum. It’s decent. So are the various veggie dishes. I also discovered coconut jello at Yang Ming. If I find it anywhere I am buying some. Yum.

So it was with great interest that I watched my kids navigate the Feast That Lay Before Them. I wondered what a choosier-eater (like Emma) would pick. What about Sarah?

Without further ado, here is what the girls chose, with no interference from either Mark or I.

A closeup of Sarah’s choices (see, cheese and sushi!) :

This is what Emma chose – her two favourite food groups! :

Jello City. This is happens when you give them the go-ahead to eat unlimited dessert:

And this is how much of it actually got eaten:

Sarah is full and can’t eat another bite:

I’m not a fan of overeating. It’s gross. But I do think the AYCE buffet is great for ethnic cuisine because it gives you the opportunity to try foods you wouldn’t normally order. Indian buffet is one of my favourite lunches. Haveli and East India Company are both great. And then there’s AYCE sushi, a relatively new concept in Ottawa. I’ve been to Sakura, Sushi Kan, and 1000 Islands Sushi on Carling Ave. They’re all okay – just okay. I can pay the same price and eat slightly less sushi, (larger portions, tastier, and made with greater care and thought) at a place like MHK, which in my opinion has the best sushi in Ottawa. Mark and I had lunch at their new Westboro location on Sunday afternoon. (Grand opening is on Friday!) It was divine.

As my foodie friend Lex once pointed out, just because you can eat all the sushi you can, doesn’t mean you SHOULD eat all the sushi you can.

I think the same can be said for anything, can it not? ;)

My other new favourite AYCE buffet is at the Hilton Lac Leamy. I’ll be writing more about it later this week.