a peek inside the fishbowl

18 Dec, 2020

This is what a funeral looks like right now

Posted by andrea tomkins in: Misc. life

I was a funeral today for Mark’s aunt. Her passing wasn’t Covid related, but Covid didn’t help matters.

I am sad, but even sadder that the novel coronavirus has changed things this much.

  • There was no indoor service, only an outdoor, graveside, service.
  • Attendees had to stand at least 6 feet away from the grave and at least 6 feet apart.
  • There was a limit to the number of people who could attend.
  • The building – and washrooms – were closed.
  • Everyone had to wear gloves and a mask, which made it challenging to recognize some extended family members.
  • There was no hugging.
  • There was no gathering after the service.

As I mentioned, the service took place outside. Fortunately it was sunny and calm. It was also -14C. My mask kept my face as warm as a scarf would. I wore long underwear under my black wool slacks. I wore a hat. I wore a wool ski sweater underneath my heaviest parka. I wore winter boots even though there wasn’t any snow on the ground; my toes were cold by the time we piled back into the car.

Aunt Joan was one of the kindest souls I’ve ver known. I know it’s pointless to wish for things that can never be, but I really wish we’d been able to honour her memory like we would have in the Before Times.

One of Joan’s daughters, who’d kept me informed about her mother’s health status these last few weeks over Facebook, told me that Joan enjoyed a glass of Zinfandel. I suggested that when this is all over we should get together and raise a glass in her memory.

I look forward to the day we will be able to hug each other at a funeral once again. In the meantime, I will light a candle for her and remember her fondly.


1 Response to "This is what a funeral looks like right now"

1 | a peek inside the fishbowl » Blog Archive First three stories, then eyes forward - a peek inside the fishbowl

January 2nd, 2021 at 2:53 pm


[…] realize I left a pretty downhearted post up here at the top, probably for longer than I had meant, but don’t take it as a sign of […]

comment form:


Stay in touch

Me and my pet projects

Ottawa Bucket list

Subscribe via email

Enter your email address to subscribe to this blog and receive notifications of new posts by email.

  • Lynn: Excellent to hear! Every person who reports getting the shot makes me feel hopeful, like we are one more small step closer to good times again. Our
  • a peek inside the fishbowl » Blog Archive I got jabbed! #TeamPfizer - a peek inside the fishbowl: […] the same day our youngest turned 20, I got my first Covid vaccine. For the record, my next one is scheduled four months from […]
  • andrea tomkins: Heeeey! I'm glad it was a good experience for you! Thanks for letting me know. :)
  • Kylie: Thanks for telling us about the SavvyCompany fondue party! We signed up with relatives across Ontario as a fun (virtual) way to celebrate my mother-in
  • Charlotte: Thank you for this awesome post. it’s a very informative blog thanks for sharing with us.
  • andrea tomkins: I don't own any Miik items, just seen those pretty dresses from afar! :) I didn't know they made leggings and am intrigued...
  • molly: Have you purchased Miik before? I have a couple of dresses and I wear them all summer - like, twice a week - and they wash beautifully. And so so comf

The Obligatory Blurb

My name is Andrea and I live in the Westboro area of Ottawa with my husband Mark and our dog Piper who is kind of a big deal on Instagram. We also have two human daughters: Emma (20) and Sarah (18). During the day I work as a writer at The Royal Ottawa Mental Health Centre. I am a longtime Ottawa blogger and I've occupied this little corner of the WWW since 1999. The Fishbowl is my whiteboard, water cooler, and journal, all rolled into one. I'm passionate about healthy living, arts and culture, family travel, great gear, good food, and sharing the best of Ottawa for families. I also love vegetables, photography, gadgets, and great design.

If you'd like to contact me, please use this form. If you're so inclined, you can read more about me here. Thank you for visiting!


Connect with me at these places too!

On the nightstand

All hail the mighty Twitter