Last night I went to a friend’s house for an evening of crafting, wine and nosh. There were about ten women there, some of whom I knew and some I didn’t. There was a lot of knitting. I was sewing felt circles for my garland … which I’m aiming to complete for Christmas 2008. (I’ve since supershrunk a pretty sweater and am using it for little circles too. Woot!)
Just before I was heading out I watched a few minutes of The Sound of Music with Mark and the girls.
I love that movie, I always have. I’ve watched it every year since I can remember. It took me years to figure out what actually happened at the end because I’d always fall asleep right around the time they were escaping through the darkened abbey.
Mark had never seen the movie before, which I found totally incomprehensible. DUDE, IT IS A CLASSIC. Sadly, he didn’t think much of it. But I have to admit, if I was a 45-year old man who saw it for the first time I’d probably think it was kind of lame too. Perhaps I think it’s so good because it’s been a major part of my film-watching life, and I have a 30 year connection to it…
The parts I saw before I left for the evening included “My Favourite Things,” followed by “Doe a Deer.” I love the little musical phrase: “When you know the notes to sing, you can sing most eeennnn-ee-thiiiing.” It’s the kind of thing I see myself bursting into on the street when the sky is blue and the birds are singing. (Click for five happy minutes on YouTube… I love the whole stretch of it, but the bit I’m referring to clocks in at 3:33.)
Oh bless those seven curtain-clothed cherubs running around picture-postcard Saltzburg with their crazy nun governess. What can I say? The whole thing makes me smile.
So last night Emma was next to me on the couch, singing along, “doe a deer, a female deer…” and, oh, I hate to say this but…
… she wasn’t hitting the notes. Singing is not something that comes naturally to her.
Emma loves to sing. She’s in the choir at school. She loves to belt out a tune. After all, singing is fun. Sarah is the more musical one in the family. She’s better at hitting the notes. She likes to sing too, and also joined the choir this year.
This is where I often run into a parenting conundrum. Both of the kids like to sing, but it’s invariably at opposing times. When one kid is singing the other one almost always demands silence. It’s an ongoing issue in our house.
Most of the time it will happen in the car. Emma will start singing and Sarah will whine and moan, demanding she stop. And most of the time she won’t even ask nicely. Does Emma’s right to sing trump Sarah’s right to quiet?
When they’re home they’re always together. It’s rare they partake in separate activities. So it’s always the same debate.
I mentioned it to one of the moms at last night’s crafting session. I asked her what she does in this situation. (She also has two kids.) “Oh,” she said. “The singer has the right to sing!” She seemed pretty certain on this one, but I’m not so certain at all.
Oh sure, sometimes I pull rank and demand quiet when I’ve truly had enough, although I really really try to let the kids sing if they want to. Sometimes when we’re outdoors I’ll start us all singing (yes, out loud) in my own off-key melody…. but ultimately I think the right to silence is equal to the right to sing. No one should be forced to listen to singing they don’t want to, don’t you think?
In the meantime I’ve asked Emma to sing quietly if she wants to sing. And no singing at the dinner table.
*sigh*
